I was just reading an email from Net-a-Porter, a store I like but can’t afford to shop in. I clicked on the trend column, thinking I could at least learn something. The column showed many of the trends I’ve come to expect this season: military/equestrian,lots of red, baroque, and leather. I was hoping to see at least a few paragraphs about the individual trends, like how to put outfits together or what are the best trends for your body type. But this column was like many others: nothing but ads. A brief description opened each section of ads, but there was no advice for me. I’m new to fashion, and I do enjoy reading about the trends. But I’ve bought enough clothes! I need to focus on building outfits and developing my personal style. I need advice, not more advertisements. I hope I can find it!

When we go shopping locally, we usually go either to Kohl’s or to the Spotsylvania mall, also known as Spotsylvania Town Centre.  We are pretty lazy-or I should say I am pretty lazy, and I never even get moving until at least 1pm.

Sunday is the day we go. I don’t have a car so we ride with Denise, our friend who has the local cab company Anderson Cab.   I don’t know if she is friends with everyone who rides with her, but she is certainly our friend. My son has a great time riding up front with her while I ride in the back with Rose.

Our major problem with the mall is that they close at 6 on Sundays.  We found this out the first time we tried to go. Our area of the world is very small: on our way in a guy we know from town stopped to say hi, and he was the one who told us the mall was about to close.  We made it just into the door of Belk that time. Just by chance we went in the door next to the shoe department. So, while we couldn’t do much shopping, I did manage to get a pair of leopard print shoes.

The very idea of me buying a pair of leopard print shoes is pretty mind-blowing.  I go through cycles in my life, and fashion is a new concept for me. I can’t explain why I suddenly started caring about how I look. I remember getting interested in fashion before we were evicted from our last apartment.  While we were living in the hotel for a year almost all of my desires and interests were in a type of suspended animation. But on bed rest with preeclampsia I realized that the women on the “Real Housewives” show I was watching were my age or younger.  I have a really strange concept of time. I had always looked at the people on tv as older than myself.  But I had aged while I wasn’t paying attention

Maybe my fashion interest isn’t quite a midlife crisis. Maybe it’s more of a midlife unrest. I hope it’s an awakening.  I have learned to spend time on myself, or at least spend money on myself.  It does make me feel better about my appearance. Maybe this really is a good thing. I can’t tell yet. It might just be a new way for me to waste boatloads of money. I hope not!